Living Solo: The Ups and Downs
I moved out of my folks’ house when I was 21 years old, back then I didn’t know that it’ll be one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Moving out truly meant being on my own, I’m my own responsibility. But independency comes with a price; the reality of cooking my own meals, a budget I had to work with, and other home related things astounded me. I’ve lived a quite spoiled life at my parents’ home; with housemaids to clean and cook for me; being on my own left me baffled about the littlest of things like cleaning the bathroom and organizing my stuff. Though little by little, I learned from past mistakes (that I’m too ashamed to blog here).
For me, living alone meant that I could stay up until 5am working on design projects without anyone bothering me or being awakened by the noise outside my room or eat in my bed. It meant I could stay curled up in bed for an entire day, eating whatever I want, fart under the sheets, and going home (I now call it my home) at whatever time I like. Being independent almost feels like being a rebel, but with your parents’ consent. I manage to support myself financially and turn down every offer to move back home by my parents. I felt so invigorated.
Though at times I get lonely, and hopelessness envelops me when my tiny place is so messy I couldn’t see the floor. And when I wake up from a severe hangover and I couldn’t find a decent breakfast or food, and when I can’t stand to eat another fastfood meal, when I terribly miss my dog (and when I think that he’s growing older without me around), sometimes I long for my mom’s nagging and bickering with my brothers over who misplaced the remote control; I think of coming back home. But I realized that I have subjected myself these feelings and issues when I decided to move out, that’s why I have to move forward.
One of the lessons I learned from living alone is not taking any crap from anyone else, and also I wouldn’t let a 24 years old who still lives with his or her parents to talk down on me. And the most important realization is that I will discover life at my own pace, and through the decisions, that I, and not anyone else, makes for me.